Voice Mail Message #74

"They had an Eagle Owl on Kelly's show I wanted you to see it. So funny.... ok.... well you missed it. Talk to you later. Maybe you can get a replay of it it's uh Live L-I-V-E at Kelly dot com. Ok? Alright talk to you later."

Brevity is not her strong suit

Last weekend I went to Boston for my friends wedding. When I go out of town I drive to my parents house to drop off my car and my dog Sophie and they shuttle me to and from the airport. The following texts were sent to my phone when my dad was driving me to the airport less than 20 minutes after I left their house. Please note that the text starts mid-thought. I am not missing a text. To give you context- Right before I left the house I gave my pug Sophie her dinner. xxxxxxxxxxxTEXT MESSAGESxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Had to call her a dozen times..she was in the entry licking her 2 front paws, she very thorough!! Called when she finished and eventually she came to the door, waited for me to go outside first. Finally found a perfect spot to decorate Dad's nice green lawn...but had to turn three times to the left ..then three times to the right, peed & pooped but forgot to cover her doodles. Went to the sliding door and just stared, so, I got up from the swing, and let her back in. She's licking her platter (bowl) clean. May His angels go before you and keep you safe carried on the angels wings to your destination. I'll pickk you up Monday. Enjoy your weekend with Ryan & Janelle and Ryan & Aura! @If you decide to explore Boston ride an AquaDuck you''l see some interesting sights but the best tour you'll HAVE to see the Pilgrims Plantation where you step back to 1600's Go into their homes, see how homes looked, where they slept. They'll talk to you but they won't know what an oven, microphone, you have to set your mind to the 1600's. You should stay for 2 hrs to experience all they have done and experienced. There's a nice Gift Shop there. Any it is just something historical and memorable. That you can experience to share your students when you teach American Studies. Okay, Sofie is still licking her FWD: This is repeated but more at end'If you decide to explore Boston ride an AquaDuck you'll see some interesting sights but the best tour you'll HAVE to see the Pilgrims Plantation where you step back to 1600's Go into their homes, see how homes looked, where they slept. They'll talk to you but they w on't know what an oven, microwave, cell phone, you have to set your mind to the 1600's. You should stay for 2 hrs to experience all they have done and e xperienced. There's a nice Gift Shop there. Any it is just something historical and memorable. That you can experience to share your students when you that's it. BILY M each American Studies. Okay, Sofie is still licking her bowl! She exerted herself so much that she's waiting for you to enter the door..Okay Punkin that XXXXXXXXXXXXX THIS NEXT SERIES OF TEXTS WAS SENT THE NEXT DAY XXXXXXXX Hi Becky ... Hope you're enjoying your weekend in Boston, good weather, good commeraderaming (means having good fellowship with friends) and good food. I'm sure you know about Lobster and Boston Baked Beans...FYI...LOL I'm sorry I couldn't take you. Dad was pacing back & forth, looking out the door for your car lights, so I thought he might prefer to take you. I should have gone because in trying to get Christie up to her w/chair I lost my balance if you have more mush for Sofie in the trunk? Let me try to remember it's 2 scoop each feeding right? I'll barely make it past brkfst. I can get some lost Christie and fell too. I was anxious for Dad back home, didn't arrive till 11:15 =( We're okay, bruised on rt thigh. Anyhoo I was curio thing from PetCo or PetSmart...whatever you say. I don't want to get her sick, and I limit giving treat when I go out. Sorry to bother you about triviality. Dad said you read your itinerary enroute. Bring it back so I can see! Love you BILYM

Ask Questions First... Think Later

My brother took my dad to the Dodgers game for Fathers Day. The plan was to meet at the house after the game. I told my brother to text me when the game was over. When I checked the score on my phone I saw that it was the bottom of the 9th inning so I decided to leave because I had an errand to run on my way there. As I was driving my brother said that Amazing Grace was supposed to be making dinner for us. I got to the house and no one was there. I went into the backyard and called my mom and texted her to see where she was and to let her know I was locked out waiting in the backyard. When she finally arrived she opened the door to the backyard and asked my dog "Sophie where is your mom?" I said "I'm right here didn't you get my call and my text message?" She goes "On my cell phone?" I said "Yeah on your cell phone." Then she starts reading the text message out loud: I'm at the house. Locked out. I'm in the backyard with Sophie. Then she looks up and says "How did you get in the house?" I said "Right now when you opened the door for me"

The Cruise

My parents and sister have been on a cruise ship for a few days now. I guess she's been trying to send messages from the ocean but they haven't come through. Right now she's in Santa Barbara so she's going back through the last weeks worth of text messages and sending them to me, my family and my best friend.... TWICE EACH Here's a look at the exciting cruse ship texts:

"Tonite Christie had Mango Smoothie as appetizer I had Butter-lettuce salad, for dinner Christie had Beef Wellington wrapped in Patt (looked & tasted yu
cky, Bob didn't like it) I had Lobster & Fille Shrimp with Asparagus and potato. Dessert was great but can't tell you what we had, Bob had Chocolate Am
aretto Souffle with Hazelnut sauce, he LIKED IT!! Waiting to see a lounge show Family Feud."

(I am leaving in the text breaks my phone adds)

"Hi guys - Christie & Bob are napping...imagine that! Thought I'd text for my entertainment. Nice trip so far, Christie's alergies are acting up! Sneezin
g non-stop since 9:30..Sundries closed till 5:30, she need something,can see Dr after 5 but if need emergency meds they charge double for her. We sail
at 5:30 for home, back home at 7:30. ...... Shirley just called! They went ashore to sightsee, asked them to get Christie meds...are on tender back
to ship!! Praise God we were able to remedy meds for Christie!! Love to all!"

(so glad I know what time the Sundries close)

"Outside ship 14th floor to see "Midnight in Paris" ... it's pretty nice in the sunshine...they provide blankets..and popcorn...how cool is this? That's all for now! Love you guys"

(not sure how my dad convinced her to see a Woody Allen movie. she hates him.)

there were also 2 blurry photos sent of my sister. one sitting in a chair drinking beer. one sitting in a chair. they were both exactly as exciting as i described them.

The Garage Sale

I made the mistake of asking my mom if I could sell some of my stuff at a garage sale at her house. I also invited 2 friends to come along and sell some stuff with me. The week of the garage sale we all got this lovely TEXT message..... YES THIS WAS A TEXT MESSAGE SENT TO PHONES.

FWD: Just a reminder! The Neighborhood Garage Sale is set for April 28th, that's this Saturday from 7:00a.m.-1:00p.m. People start arriving at 6:00 so
everyone needs to be ready! I would suggest you come Friday evening and set up a table with your goods - all priced! Also, you should have change of
1-5-10's and or 20's. We have four tables available, so each of you gets your own table. Becky, you & Marla can spend the night upstairs to make i
t easier for your sales, before and after! If you have any questions call me! Bobby, Heidi will be coming to help and she is interested in your su
it so bring it! Now we have to pray for favorable weather. I have grocery bags available for goods, if you have any bring them and I'll wind them up. I
f some of you have clothes bring hangers and we can hang on rail to garage door. That's it! Becky forward this to Marla! That's it!!

*** She wrote that as one message but my phone broke the message up into 6 messages. No one responded to this text so she sent the same message again. Thank god I have unlimited text messaging.

The Irony

Bought my sister a scarf and some booties at the GAP for xmas. A few weeks later my mom decided to take them back to the store to get money for them. She called me frantically once she was at the mall. I was at work. She left me about 4 voice mail messages and then followed up with this text message:

Becky do you still have the receipts for Christie's boots & sweater? Please call or text yes or no! I guess you're very busy so surely you can answer y or b. Mom

I was more than just a little annoyed that she was bugging me so much while I was working and that she didn't ask me to look for the receipts when I was at home and had time to look for them rather than yelling at me while she was inside the store. Here was my response:

Very busy working at work. I do not know of I have them I do not keep receipts at my desk at work I will have to look at home when I'm not working but I doubt I still have the receipt.

This was her response:
A long dissertation of complaints were unnecessary..you could have just texted y or n!

"A long dissertation" ohhhhhhhhh the irony mom...

The Talent Scout

It's been a long time since I've updated and I have a few texts to share. This is a random one I never responded to. I like that she wants him to do voice over but thinks he's hot which is ultimately how we chose voice over artists at work:

"Check this guy for voice overs this is on U-tube look for Emilio's Beer commercial!! I think he looks like Alex on Grey's Anatomy...let me know what yo u think! He is a SAG member. Mom"

Just did a search on the ol "U-tube" and found Emelio in Beer Commercial. Can you figure out which guy my mom thinks looks like Alex from Grey's Anatomy?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U9mee5tot00